Stop right there, whoever you are. Telling a pregnant woman—especially a first timer that you had issues with your epidural and felt more of the labour than initially intended is definitely not a welcome topic of conversation. First-time mums to be are already terrified of what will happen next, so details of how excruciatingly long and painful your labour was are not even remotely helpful. Also, if we may, please refrain from talking about how many stitches you got. Should you sugar-coat it and make up an overly positive story about the experience? Of course not, but we advise that you save the in-depth discussion for after the mum who seeks your company has given birth.
- “It’s going to hurt so much—are you scared?!”
Unless she’s already birthed a litter of little ones, the answer is yes, she’s probably scared. She’s likely having night sweats just thinking about it, thanks to unhelpful childbirth horror stories (see above). If you don’t find it in you to share some helpful hints, it is advisable to skip this line of conversation.
- “We’re all going to that amazing new restaurant in DIFC tonight! The dinner starts at 10 pm, and I bought new sky-high heels for the occasion. You didn’t want to come…did you?” Your pregnant friend may not be up for joining you on the next girls’ night for many, many reasons, but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t want to be asked. A pregnant woman can still go out and have fun like everyone else, wearing shoes that would be better off serving as a mantelpiece. Don’t assume she doesn’t want to come simply because she’s got a bun in the oven.